Joe has had the opportunity to visit with James several times a week for the last couple of months as his health began to deteriorate. He would always come home with stories about the folks at Goodsprings, James' family, and the pace of life in that little spot on the map. I wondered why he was so intrigued by all of this..... but after spending time there, I get it. And now, I can't stop thinking about it.....
Goodsprings consists of a couple of roads (not exactly dirt, not exactly paved), a post office (open two hours a day), a couple of churches and graveyards, and a few houses. Most of the people are related and everyone knows everyone else. These people do not Facebook...... they sit on their front porches and visit. They do not blog.... they have conversations, face to face. These people do not Google or Tweet or Instagram. They do not have much....they live simply..... and I'm certain that their lives are richer than mine. I am captivated by this little speck of a place. I am completely intrigued by its PEOPLE, its PRIORITIES, and its PACE.
I watched a small "town" of people love on each other, support a grieving family, and come together in a way that many don't any more..... not because they don't WANT to, but because life is so "full" and we have so much going on.... Times are moving faster and folks are busy...... we reach out to each other through email and Facebook and texts..... but these people were different. The care and concern they showed for each other was LIVE.... and so sweet to witness. No one was too busy that day to care for the Hartley family in the loss of their brother. No one was too busy to cook a meal for them to eat together after the funeral. As the pace of my life has slowed a bit this year, I'm sorta re-thinking some of my priorities, and it was so nice to learn a few lessons from the folks of Goodsprings.... lessons about slowing down and tending to what's REALLY important.
There are many characters I discovered in my few hours in Goodsprings.... the preacher, the women of the food committee, the family patriarchs, the cousins, the neighbors, the old friends..... and they all have a story that brings tears to my eyes. Maybe it's because these people remind me of folks I grew up around or maybe it is a reminder of what my fast-paced life keeps me from enjoying. All I know is that my time there was too short..... I could have sat in that tiny little wood-paneled house at that old kitchen table for HOURS and just watched them all talk and eat and love. But most of all, I think, I could watch the Hartley brothers.
Their father died when James was four years old, so these boys (and their two sisters) were raised by their grandfather. I don't know how they grew up, what experiences they had, or what life was like.... but, I know that they are kind, compassionate, soft-spoken men who live simply and slowly and take care of their people.
Glenn and Damon, James' brothers, have been by his side twenty four/seven for the last two months. They have cared for him, spent time with him, loved on him, laughed with him, comforted him, encouraged him, and taken care of him. Through his visits with James, Joe had the pleasure of spending time with them, too, and getting to know them a little more. This trio of brothers lived "small" lives according to the world's standards, but there is much we can learn from each of them.
Glenn Hartley is quiet and kind. He keeps a comb in his shirt pocket and is one of the most compassionate care-takers ever. Glenn's wife was sick for YEARS before she died, and he devoted his entire life to caring for her. These last two months, Glenn has used those same precious care-taking skills to care for his brother. When Mary met Glenn at the funeral, she immediately reached for him and let him hold her for a LONG time. She has NEVER done this with ANYONE! I honestly think she sensed the kindness and gentleness in him. She shyly slipped his comb out of his pocket and immediately started combing her hair AND his with it..... and, so sweetly, Glenn just let her do it. She even let Glenn do her hair, too! He had never laid eyes on this little person... barely knew who she was.... and yet they bonded instantly.
After James died last Sunday, Glenn spent the next few days going through his stuff... and of utmost importance, was gathering all the pictures and memories that he knew Joe would enjoy and collecting it for us to take home. It was very important to Glenn that Joe have these things: he knew, and talked often, about how much Joe meant to James. I've known Glenn all of two hours, if that.... and from him, I learned to think of others first. Meet the needs of others before you meet your own needs. Make sure that those around you are taken care of and, most importantly, make sure they know BY YOUR ACTIONS how much you love them.
Damon is quite the character. Think Uncle Si on Duck Dynasty..... seriously..... minus the pony tail, he looks JUST LIKE HIM. And apparently, Damon is like the Godfather of Walker County. He's the local notary, gives the nod to any public officials that are elected, counsels local folks on their life and business, and makes the decisions for the entire clan. If a decision needs to be made, everyone turns to Damon.... and then agrees with whatever he says. Plus, on top of all of that, he is PRECIOUS...... quiet, kind, compassionate. More than once in the last few weeks, he's pulled Joe into a back room to clarify legal matters concerning James and his care. Although he is looked up to and respected by everyone who knows him, he isn't above asking questions and confessing that there are things he doesn't know. In my short time knowing Damon (and even less time actually TALKING to him... poor old fool is practically deaf.... which is a whole OTHER hilarious story all by itself), I learned that no matter how many people think highly of you or what notoriety you achieve in life, DO NOT think too highly of yourself..... and don't be so big for your britches that you can't be the fella in the middle when three folks are riding in the truck (again.... another story and MY FAVORITE by far!)
And then there's James. James Edward Hartley. This man ADORED my husband. They were not related by blood, but James would say, without hesitation, that Joe Powell was the best thing about his life..... his absolute pride and joy. And when Joe started having boys of his own..... well..... that was just IT. James LOVED visiting with Jack and Max and, according to his Goodsprings kin, talked about those THREE boys... Joe, Jack, and Max.... ALL THE TIME. He remembered every birthday with a call and a money order in the mail and loved to visit to hear what was happening in their lives these days.
(Our FAVORITE picture of James and the boys....)
As he was growing up, Joe spent a LOT of time with James and Moma Jewel..... they had an unbelievable impact on his life. He wanted for nothing, knew there was always a place for him in their home, and tagged along with them on road trips, restaurant endeavors and, of course, visits to Goodsprings. Although there are many lessons that James could teach about hard work and great cuts of beef and how to make great soup, fried anything, cornbread, or tomato gravy....... his greatest lessons were taught through his adoration of Joe. Lesson: Love your family with complete abandon. Make sure that you tell them ALL THE TIME how much you love them and how proud you are of them. Talk to other people about how much you love them. Be there for them when they feel alone or sad or discouraged. Be the loudest cheerleader they have. Support them in EVERYTHING they do.... even the dumb stuff.... and be there to encourage them when the dumb stuff turns out to be.... well.... dumb. Praise them. Keep pictures of them ALL OVER THE PLACE and show those pictures to anyone and everyone who will listen. Call them just to see how things are going, and ALWAYS.... ALWAYS.... offer them a cup of coffee.
Jamie-Bo, the Powell 5 think you are just great. Thanks for helping to shape the person that our Dad is and for being someone that we KNOW is in our corner, no matter what. Thanks for being such an awesome example of unconditional love, personal sacrifice, and family. Our memories of you are BATHED in love and appreciation and gratefulness. We love you.
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